90% Mental

U2's song "Running to Stand Still" almost nails this topic for me. Not the part about the drug usage, but the idea that running and striving in our own strength is rather pointless and only causes us to return to where we started in the first place. Amidst the barrage of disappointments and chaos that life throws me (and all of us, in turn), there is that glimpse of what it would be like if I could just rest in the eye of the storm. Seeing my chance, Hope springs eternal once more, and I jump at the chance to fulfill that longing by trying harder to achieve it. Funny how that's not how to make things happen.

I recently became a runner (for those who know me and haven't seen me in a while, you can stop laughing now). I had always heard that running was 90% mental and only 10% effort (actually, people seem to say that about just about everything). Now, I must say that in the beginning I considered that the biggest lie I had ever been told, but now, now I am beginning to understand what they mean. The "runner's high" is described as the feeling one gets once a certain distance is traveled and when the goal is reached the runner feels as if they could just keep going. It is no longer a matter of physical exertion. (This was another running myth in my book.) I figured out that if I wanted to start running, I had to do just that, start. There really isn't any other way around it. But, if I wanted to keep running, I had to get to that mental place where it was really not me doing it. Before I get accused of new-age weirdness or a drug-induced high instead of the aforementioned "runner's high", I should explain. The Philippians verse goes,"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me", right? I took that verse and turned it around to emphasize what I had been missing in that short statement for years. I understand it better when I think, "Christ and His strength can do anything He wants in me, if I let Him". If Christ is giving all the effort for my benefit already, I will just get in His way by running and striving for the same exact thing.

I'm running these days less for what running does for me physically and more for what it does for me mentally. I can sit home all day "resting" and never have one clear thought outside my own pitiful existence, but when I run, I more easily turn my thoughts to the one who wants to do all things through me and towards the others that He places in my path. I'm not promoting running as much as I'm trying to convey that doing something that gets me outside of myself and forces me to rely on strength that is not my own is incredibly hopeful for me. I am no longer running to simply stand still. I am running (literally and metaphorically) to let Christ's strength be displayed in my life. At least, that's what happens on the good days.

12, 703

I guess I've been feeling a bit cannibalistic lately...I'm going to steal a bit of thunder from my friend Julie's blog to let you in on how the Cooper River Bridge Run went this year. I'm a little put off by the fact that Julie and I finished at exactly the same chip time, and yet I placed three whole slots behind her in the standings. This same phenomena happened when I finished the Kiawah 1/2 Marathon with my friend Veronica in December - what is the deal? I guess I can find consolation in that "the first shall be last". The race day conditions could not have been better. No wind, no blazing sun, 74 degrees, and no strollers all combined to give this year's race a much more pleasant feel. In addition to all that pleasantness, I also managed to train for this one! (Kristin, I'm just sorry I couldn't have lessened the blow to your running reputation with a similar time last year:)).

I'm currently attempting to find motivation to train for the Nashville Country Music 1/2 Marathon coming up April 28th. Part of my motivation now is that I recently lost my Uncle/Godfather George and a good friend, Dennis, from Colorado to cancer. I am raising money for The American Cancer Society for the race and will donate any proceeds in their memory. I did get to see my uncle at his home in New Jersey the Thursday before he died. While it was sad, it was good to be there and to be with my aunt and cousins as well. On a strange note, today I received a birthday card from Dennis' wife, Jeanne, written two days before Dennis passed away. Both Dennis and Jeanne were bright lights during my time in Colorado. I know Dennis will be greatly missed. I would covet your prayers for both my friends in Colorado and my family.